John’s parents divorced when he was a toddler and he immigrated from Cape Verde to the US as a teenager with his mother. His dad...
Archive for category: Relationship Counseling
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10.052018May 30, 2018
You’re Controlling
Andrea and Don came to marriage counseling to work on their disconnection. As they talked about their disconnection, Andrea talked about feeling micro-managed and controlled, ...
03.052018May 30, 2018
You Don’t Fight Anymore
By Dr. Richard ReinIn Couples Therapy, Marriage Counseling, Relationship CounselingTags Collaboration, Parenting, Ripple Effect
As Roberta and Dan were concluding their marriage counseling sessions, we were reviewing their progress. Roberta shared that their 8 year old son Conor recently...
26.042018May 30, 2018
What Do You Need?
I was recently reading the Gottman Institute’s newsletter Marriage Minute and the Gottmans’ shared a story about their relationship. Dr. Julie Gottman shared feeling upset...
19.042018May 30, 2018
Disengaged
The majority of couples in counseling have difficulty managing conflict, but discord doesn’t characterize every couple. Some couples are disengaged. Disconnected couples may avoid addressing...
21.032018May 30, 2018
Thirty Percent
I hadn’t seen Mark and Ellie in a couple of months due to illness and scheduling issues. When I asked them how they were doing,...
07.032018May 30, 2018
Reacting to Reactivity
By Dr. Richard ReinIn Couples Therapy, Marriage Counseling, Relationship CounselingTags Escalation, Reactivity
When Brendan finished talking about a situation at work, his wife Marianne started to share a story about the neighbors. Brendan was exhausted and talked...
28.022018May 30, 2018
Overcoming Apathy
By Dr. Richard ReinIn Couples Therapy, Marriage Counseling, Relationship CounselingTags Apathy, Disconnected, Listening
Because they were so disconnected, Laurie and Matt finally agreed to come to couples counseling. Laurie previously talked to Matt about her needs not being...
21.022018May 30, 2018
Mindful Communication
By Dr. Richard ReinIn Couples Therapy, Marriage Counseling, Relationship CounselingTags Communication, Mindfulness, Respect
A couple, with whom I recently started, said they talked to each other with “careless disregard”. Their comments were sometimes snide and mean. We talked...
14.022018May 30, 2018
Let me Finish
By Dr. Richard ReinIn Couples Therapy, Marriage Counseling, Relationship CounselingTags Emotional Restraint, Escalation, Interrupting
When couples talk directly to each other in couples counseling, the ground rule is not to interrupt each other. When couples interrupt, they typically escalate....