It was Friday night and Dave and Amy were planning to go out to dinner with one year old Ava. Amy was commuting home from...
Archive for tag: Criticism
07.042016March 29, 2016
Can’t You See
By Dr. Richard ReinIn Couples Therapy, Marriage Counseling, Relationship CounselingTags Communication, Criticism, Escalation
Elysia and Scott were sitting in the physician’s waiting room waiting for Elysia’s appointment. Elysia’s cell phone rang and she answered. Elysia kept the conversation...
15.032016January 3, 2016
We Need to Talk
By Dr. Richard ReinIn Couples Therapy, Relationship CounselingTags Criticism, Escalation, Processing
Robert dreaded when Diane said, “We need to talk.” He knew the conversation was likely to escalate. She criticized him, he then defended himself, and...
19.012016January 3, 2016
Can’t you Take a Joke?
Tom was making a joke. When Judy responded negatively, he said, “Can’t you take a joke?” Instead, Judy found Tom’s “joke” insulting. A joke is...
05.012016January 3, 2016
Artillery and Bombs
Relationships can become battlefields. Criticism is launched horizontally. A partner intentionally or unintentionally attacks. When one is attacked, the recipient defends him or herself, and...
20.102015October 23, 2015
Critical Feedback
Steve didn’t like how his wife Kate was dealing with their teenage son in the morning. Tommy was reluctant to get up for school in...
22.092015October 7, 2015
What’s Wrong With You?
By Dr. Richard ReinIn Marriage CounselingTags Connecting, Criticism, Defensiveness, Emotional Support, Escalation
Tricia and Dave shared with me about a fight they had. Tricia was upset when she had a distressing argument with her brother. Dave could...
08.092015October 7, 2015
Goose Bumps
Judy is the wife of a couple with whom I’ve been working. When I asked her what she wanted to accomplish in couples therapy, her...
14.072015August 18, 2015
Feedback Loops
One goal in couples counseling is to have respectful conversations about relationship issues that need to be addressed. If a couple escalates with each other,...
01.062015August 18, 2015
Let Your Hair Down
Tom and Ally were having a great time at a club when Tom was about to take a picture of them to capture the night....