All relationships have setbacks, whether from outside the relationship or within. The challenge is for couples to learn from these setbacks. Rather than defaulting to...
Archive for category: Couples Therapy
Lost in the Mundane
Rebecca and Michael came to me in crisis. Michael had an affair with a co-worker, and they wanted to work through it. Rebecca wanted to...
Talk to Me
Occasionally, I have couples who can’t talk directly to each other in couples counseling. Their patterns are so entrenched that they repeat the unhealthy dynamics...
Our Money
When couples discuss finances, individuals tend to react when a partner talks about “my” money rather than “our” money. Even when couples have the traditional...
Checking in is Partnership
John mowed the lawn, but Angela was upset with him. His actions impacted her plans for the day. She talked about the importance of John...
Gnawing
Sometimes, couples are unsure when to bring up an issue and when to let it go. A good guideline is to consider talking about something...
Shoulds Are Coulds
Shoulds are problematic in couples counseling. When someone thinks their partner should do or say something, it imposes an expectation on the partner. Shoulds have...
Rewiring Your Relationship
Chris and Angela started couples counseling in a very unhappy state. Chris was dealing with depression, and Angela judged his lack of involvement. Negative interactions...
Defaulting
In a couples counseling session, Kerri talked about scrolling on her phone because Daniel was watching TV. Daniel talked about watching TV because Kerri was...
You Seem Off
Leah and Robert were on a road trip when Robert started slowing down on the highway, and Leah said, “What’s wrong with you?” Robert heard...