A couple, with whom I recently started, said they talked to each other with “careless disregard”. Their comments were sometimes snide and mean. We talked...
14.022018May 30, 2018
Let me Finish
By Dr. Richard ReinIn Couples Therapy, Marriage Counseling, Relationship CounselingTags Emotional Restraint, Escalation, Interrupting
When couples talk directly to each other in couples counseling, the ground rule is not to interrupt each other. When couples interrupt, they typically escalate....
07.022018May 30, 2018
Internal Trust
When we think about trust in relationships, we usually think about fidelity. Fidelity means the boundaries of the relationship are intact, i.e., there is loyalty...
31.012018April 25, 2018
I’d Rather be Happy than Right
“I’d rather be happy than right” is a quote from a husband of one of my couples. Being happy in a relationship beats winning. He’s...
24.012018April 25, 2018
I See it Differently
An individual expresses a perspective or memory, and their partner, says, “I disagree.” or even worse, “That’s not true.” These responses tends to be contentious,...
17.012018April 25, 2018
I Can Read Your Mind
Sometimes an individual expects a partner to know what he or she is thinking. This process is referred to as mind reading—I expect you to...
10.012018April 25, 2018
Give the Gift that Keeps Giving
An area of contention for couples can be gift giving. Partners can have expectations for what they want for various holidays such as birthdays, anniversaries,...
03.012018April 25, 2018
Don’t Punish me With Your Silence
By Dr. Richard ReinIn Couples Therapy, Marriage Counseling, Relationship CounselingTags Communication, Silence
As I was watching an episode of Netflix’s series The Crown, the Prince of Edinborough said to his wife Queen Elizabeth, “Don’t punish me with...
20.122017April 25, 2018
Put Your Shoes Away
By Dr. Richard ReinIn Couples Therapy, Marriage Counseling, Relationship CounselingTags Conflict, Differences
Differences can create conflict in relationships. The challenge is to distinguish between personality differences—which are unlikely to change—and behaviors, which are amenable to change. Personality...
13.122017April 25, 2018
That’s Gross!
By Dr. Richard ReinIn Couples Therapy, Marriage Counseling, Relationship CounselingTags Conflict, Criticism
David put his finger in a jar of peanut butter, licked the peanut butter off his finger, and proceeded to put his licked finger back...