I have been working with Chuck and Alyson in couples counseling for about 9 months, and they talked about their lack of intimacy—no affection or...
Archive for category: Uncategorized
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01.032023February 13, 2023
Accept vs. Agree
Patrick and Stephanie have been together for four decades and were really fond of each other. However, these moments only occasionally shined through in our...
01.042021October 25, 2022
Clarity Creates Change
By Dr. Richard ReinIn Couples Therapy, Relationship Counseling, UncategorizedTags Escalation, Flashpoints, Responses
Frank went out to pick up some groceries, but Meredith didn’t know where he was. When he returned, Meredith expressed her upset feelings about not...
03.022021October 25, 2022
Listen
By Dr. Richard ReinIn Couples Therapy, Relationship Counseling, UncategorizedTags Communication, Subtleties
Lauren and Anthony generally have a great relationship. They love each other deeply but struggle with communication. Their challenge is that communication difficulties are subtle,...
10.042019October 25, 2022
I’m Sorry
By Dr. Richard ReinIn Couples Therapy, Relationship Counseling, UncategorizedTags Apologies, Conflict, Remorse, Responsibility
Apologies help heal conflict. There are different levels of apologies and each level described below becomes more effective. Level 1: “I’m sorry.” This is the...
21.112018October 25, 2022
Flammable Conversations
By Dr. Richard ReinIn Couples Therapy, Relationship Counseling, UncategorizedTags Communication, Escalation, Needs
Kent realized the grill was low on propane gas, so he brought the propane canister from the shed into the house and put in at...
11.102018October 25, 2022
Raise Expectations
Since Kate and Rick were progressing well in marriage counseling, we talked about what we needed to see to indicate it might be time to...
12.092018October 25, 2022
I’m Not Going to Change
One of my couples began to squabble during a couples counseling session and the husband Matt said, “I’m not going to change.” Since couples counseling...
05.092018October 25, 2022
You Should
By Dr. Richard ReinIn Couples Therapy, Relationship Counseling, UncategorizedTags Criticism, Judgement
“Shoulds” are problematic in relationships. They indicate that a partner should act or not act in a particular way. If a partner doesn’t act accordingly,...
08.082018October 25, 2022
Decelerating
By Dr. Richard ReinIn Couples Therapy, Relationship Counseling, UncategorizedTags Decelerate, Escalation
A husband was asking me how his conversations with his wife could decelerate, once they begin to escalate. He described his conversations as driving 100...