Successful couples know how to discuss issues without escalating. If they do escalate, they may be able to repair conflict as it’s occurring. If not,...
Archive for tag: Escalation
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24.062020September 9, 2020
From My Couch to Yours
By Dr. Richard ReinIn Couples Therapy, Marriage Counseling, Relationship CounselingTags Escalation, telehealth, virtual counseling
During the pandemic, a number of couples doubted the efficacy of telehealth. Some couples who I saw pre-pandemic chose not to continue until we could...
11.122019September 5, 2019
Learning From a Debacle
By Dr. Richard ReinIn Couples Therapy, Marriage Counseling, Relationship CounselingTags Accusations, Defensiveness, Escalation
I hadn’t seen Tim and Maura for a while, but they talked about how much progress they were making. Then Tim brought up a time...
21.112018October 25, 2022
Flammable Conversations
By Dr. Richard ReinIn Couples Therapy, Relationship Counseling, UncategorizedTags Communication, Escalation, Needs
Kent realized the grill was low on propane gas, so he brought the propane canister from the shed into the house and put in at...
08.082018October 25, 2022
Decelerating
By Dr. Richard ReinIn Couples Therapy, Relationship Counseling, UncategorizedTags Decelerate, Escalation
A husband was asking me how his conversations with his wife could decelerate, once they begin to escalate. He described his conversations as driving 100...
07.032018May 30, 2018
Reacting to Reactivity
By Dr. Richard ReinIn Couples Therapy, Marriage Counseling, Relationship CounselingTags Escalation, Reactivity
When Brendan finished talking about a situation at work, his wife Marianne started to share a story about the neighbors. Brendan was exhausted and talked...
14.022018May 30, 2018
Let me Finish
By Dr. Richard ReinIn Couples Therapy, Marriage Counseling, Relationship CounselingTags Emotional Restraint, Escalation, Interrupting
When couples talk directly to each other in couples counseling, the ground rule is not to interrupt each other. When couples interrupt, they typically escalate....
11.102017April 25, 2018
Deliberate Practice
In my couples counseling practice, couples spend almost the entire session talking directly to each other, typically discussing the most difficult issues in their relationship....
20.042017September 19, 2024
Well, Maybe Not Every Relationship-Physical Aggressiveness
By Dr. Richard ReinIn Couples Therapy, Marriage Counseling, Relationship CounselingTags Battering, Escalation, Infidelity, Intimidation, Physical Aggressiveness
Couples deserve to succeed, but there are certain types of relationships that are unlikely to be successful. These relationships involve: battering, active alcohol or drug...
30.032017January 17, 2017
Zero To One Hundred—Part 2
By Dr. Richard ReinIn Couples Therapy, Marriage Counseling, Relationship CounselingTags Demands, Escalation, Withdrawal
Demands can also initiate escalation. Adults don’t like to be told what to do, how to do it, the right way to do it, or...