Rachel is looking for emotional support from her sometimes dismissive husband, Rob. Rob tended to say, “You’re fine,” when she shared something emotionally upsetting. She found this comment dismissive, and I encouraged Rob to stop using that response.

They were going to a party together, and Rob commanded that she go. When Rachel commented on his tone, he corrected himself and said, “I always feel better when you are with me.” The statement was much sweeter than an order.

Rachel said she wanted to master healthy communication. That was an excellent summary of what couples try to achieve in couples counseling—master healthy communication.