During a couples counseling session, Debbie told her husband Al, “You are depressed.” The problem with the statement is that it’s critical and analytic—she’s diagnosing...
Archive for category: Marriage Counseling
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04.042018May 30, 2018
You’re Too Tense
As her kids were getting older, Madeline decided to return to work outside the home. She started her own business and was having great success....
28.032018May 30, 2018
Torn Between Two Women
As an only child, Joe feels obligated to his seventy-two year old mother. His father died years ago and his mother’s only sibling recently died....
21.032018May 30, 2018
Thirty Percent
I hadn’t seen Mark and Ellie in a couple of months due to illness and scheduling issues. When I asked them how they were doing,...
14.032018May 30, 2018
The Moody Spouse
Nicole and John were coming home from a party when they got caught up in traffic. John was annoyed and nothing Nicole said could assuage...
07.032018May 30, 2018
Reacting to Reactivity
By Dr. Richard ReinIn Couples Therapy, Marriage Counseling, Relationship CounselingTags Escalation, Reactivity
When Brendan finished talking about a situation at work, his wife Marianne started to share a story about the neighbors. Brendan was exhausted and talked...
28.022018May 30, 2018
Overcoming Apathy
By Dr. Richard ReinIn Couples Therapy, Marriage Counseling, Relationship CounselingTags Apathy, Disconnected, Listening
Because they were so disconnected, Laurie and Matt finally agreed to come to couples counseling. Laurie previously talked to Matt about her needs not being...
21.022018May 30, 2018
Mindful Communication
By Dr. Richard ReinIn Couples Therapy, Marriage Counseling, Relationship CounselingTags Communication, Mindfulness, Respect
A couple, with whom I recently started, said they talked to each other with “careless disregard”. Their comments were sometimes snide and mean. We talked...
14.022018May 30, 2018
Let me Finish
By Dr. Richard ReinIn Couples Therapy, Marriage Counseling, Relationship CounselingTags Emotional Restraint, Escalation, Interrupting
When couples talk directly to each other in couples counseling, the ground rule is not to interrupt each other. When couples interrupt, they typically escalate....
24.012018April 25, 2018
I See it Differently
An individual expresses a perspective or memory, and their partner, says, “I disagree.” or even worse, “That’s not true.” These responses tends to be contentious,...