Criticism erodes relationships. Being mindful that your words are non-critical is a key to success. If your partner reacts or responds defensively to your words,...
Relationship Resources Blog
Each day my life is enriched by listening to and guiding couples as they bring their raw experiences to sessions and we try to make sense of difficult times. Through these blog posts, I hope to give readers a snapshot of our work including examples of the real issues that people bring, and how we can find meaning and a path out together. Their identities are protected, but each experience is real. Because relationships are complex, my role is to help couples share their experiences while providing a conceptual road map to understand their experiences, finding a way out of the woods of painful experiences. This blog shares stories and concepts; I hope it provides hope, insight and richness to each reader’s own journey.
We’ve Grown Apart
Two of the more common reasons for divorcing are: we’ve grown apart or we have stopped talking to each other. In fact, even successful relationships...
Marital Health
Some individuals can’t get their partners into marriage counseling until bringing up divorce. The person may have been talking about getting help for their marital...
Better Versions
Drew is in his early forties, and Kristine is in her late thirties. Neither has been married before. They have been together for 2 years...
What Would Have Worked For Me
In our couples counseling session, Tom began to tell Ally what she should have done in a particular situation. I interrupted him and asked him...
Tech Boundaries
Aimee and Chris were out to dinner, and Chris got on his phone to record an event in his schedule. Aimee was annoyed by this...
Deepen the Change
Sue and Eric were making very nice progress in couples counseling, and in reviewing their improvements, they began to talk about their families. Sue talked...
Thousands of Little Choices
Individuals constantly make behavioral choices in their marital interactions: they either turn toward their partner, turn away from their partner, or turn against their partner....
Working on Yourself
Caitlyn and Alex have been together a decade and a half, but now they hardly talk to each other. They both want to save the...
Triggers
Trigger words are language that unintentionally evokes a negative reaction in a partner. These words are typically unique to the couple and occasionally go across...
Working on Themselves
Sheri and Ed were really struggling. They initially made progress in couples counseling but were having a setback. Early in the work, they were working...
Coming Home
Brett and Gina were living out of the area for many years, and Gina was very resentful about this. Now that they were back home,...