Amy and Jack reported that they had a four hour “unfiltered “conversation since their last couples counseling session. I knew unfiltered was not good, e.g.,...
Relationship Resources Blog
Each day my life is enriched by listening to and guiding couples as they bring their raw experiences to sessions and we try to make sense of difficult times. Through these blog posts, I hope to give readers a snapshot of our work including examples of the real issues that people bring, and how we can find meaning and a path out together. Their identities are protected, but each experience is real. Because relationships are complex, my role is to help couples share their experiences while providing a conceptual road map to understand their experiences, finding a way out of the woods of painful experiences. This blog shares stories and concepts; I hope it provides hope, insight and richness to each reader’s own journey.
An Unwilling Participant
A man recently called me because he and his wife were having marital problems. His wife was refusing to come to marriage counseling, but he...
Honeymoon Blues
Jen shared a story in couples counseling. When she and Jay were on their honeymoon, Jay talked to another woman for over an hour. Jen...
Lost in Translation
In our last couples counseling session, Sherry shared that she is still not getting her needs met, such as affection. She wants Dennis to ask...
When Wine Glasses are Just Wine Glasses
I first saw Kate and Steve a couple of years ago. Steve had a number of indiscretions that Kate was tired of. She was hoping...
Sharing Struggles
Kurt is struggling at work. His job is eventually being transferred overseas. To keep him in his job during the transition, he accepted an attractive...
Be Oneself
In a couples counseling session, the husband said, “I’d feel more positive if I didn’t need to put my armor on.” I was struck by...
More Than Roomates
Katelyn described a transactional relationship with Jake. They managed a household together and raised children, but the relationship felt more like roommates. The romance and...
But We Have All These Things
Since Scott is self-employed, his work often blends into the weekend. Andrea talked about wanting to spend more time together on the weekend as a...
Change Possibilities
Essential skills for successful couples are to: give good feedback and to absorb feedback. First of all, feedback is sharing the impact of a partner’s...
Correcting Perceptions
Tom was quiet at home. Donna perceived his being quiet as him thinking that he was better than her. When she brought this up at...
I’ll Consider It
During our couples counseling session, Ann was asking for something, and Mark responded with “We’ll see.” Ann viscerally reacted to his statement but wasn’t clear...