Sexual problems are more common than depression and anxiety combined. Fifty percent of married couples and sixty five percent of unmarried couples report having sexual...
Relationship Resources Blog
Each day my life is enriched by listening to and guiding couples as they bring their raw experiences to sessions and we try to make sense of difficult times. Through these blog posts, I hope to give readers a snapshot of our work including examples of the real issues that people bring, and how we can find meaning and a path out together. Their identities are protected, but each experience is real. Because relationships are complex, my role is to help couples share their experiences while providing a conceptual road map to understand their experiences, finding a way out of the woods of painful experiences. This blog shares stories and concepts; I hope it provides hope, insight and richness to each reader’s own journey.
Who Needs to Change
In a couples counseling session, Paul wants Meg to work on herself. Since Paul focuses on Meg changing and not himself, this is a form...
Symbols
Without saying anything, Jim walked away from dinner with the family to watch the game. In our couples counseling session, Patty felt safe enough to...
Sharing Vulerabilities
Steve & Sarah have disconnected over the years. Steve shared in our marriage counseling session that he was seeing a therapist individually for years. Sarah...
I did. I didn’t
“I did.” or “I didn’t.” are often examples of defensiveness. If a partner says you did not do something and the response is “I did.”,...
Deliberate Practice
In my couples counseling practice, couples spend almost the entire session talking directly to each other, typically discussing the most difficult issues in their relationship....
Crisis
Infidelity is sometimes the crisis that brings couples to counseling, but ultimately couples are working on their relationship in couples counseling. These couples often work...
Fried Dough
Diane asked Tom about his time with the kids at the Marshfield Fair and he mentioned that they got fried dough. Diane loved fried dough...
There’s Still Hope
One of the sadder situations as a couples therapist is when couples get to couples counseling too late. It only takes one individual—who has lost...
Well, Maybe Not Every Relationship-Serial Infidelity
Helping couples recover from physical or emotional affairs is unfortunately standard work in couples counseling. Most affairs occur when couples disconnect due to conflict and...
Well, Maybe Not Every Relationship-Addiction
Active alcohol and drug addiction also makes it unlikely to have a successful relationship. The relationship is often reactive to the presence of the addiction....
Well, Maybe Not Every Relationship-Physical Aggressiveness
Couples deserve to succeed, but there are certain types of relationships that are unlikely to be successful. These relationships involve: battering, active alcohol or drug...